Sitting on the living room couch, looking around the ginormous area, I see all of my wonderful relatives reuniting with me. This is the special moment that every person wishes they could have. Some families are very unfortunate to lose family members, and a person may have a hard time trying to live their life the way that they used to. Family should be one of everybody's top priorities because if we grow apart from our family members, things will just keep getting worse and worse, and before you know it, they will roll right down the hill of your drastic life.
In this book, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith, one of the reasons that family is important is because everybody needs somebody to go to for advice. For example, when Francie goes to her mom, Katie, for some guidance about her changes, she realizes that she needs help. That is what family is for -- to help you with the things that you cannot do alone. Another way that family is crucial is that even though every family has some fights, eventually they get through them. Like when Johnny and Katie have spurts where they get mad at one another, the next day most likely they forgot all about what happened previously and start fresh again.
There are many different reasons why people these days have lost some relatives, but if you really do care, you will never let them out of your grasp. Do not ever fail to keep your family with you in the long run, and they will always be with you too.
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I think that was a well written essay. One of the things that I look for is do you sound like an adult and I think you almost have it down. Just don't say like and put perenthesis into it. Otherwise, I think you sounded like an adult. One of the things that I really thought was good is how your voice went. I thought it flowed and that it was really nice. Another thing is that I think you have a grasp on what the meaning of family is. That was a really good description of family. Just don't refer to the book like when it was like, like when... Otherwise, great essay and keep the voice. Really strong!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Chandler. There was a lot of voice and personality in this. I think you cut the introduction off a little bit though. In the beginning, there was the scene of a family sitting together. You may want to expand that scene a little. But other than that, I really liked this!
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